Day 13

Agh, I forgot to say this, but Monday I got the second shot of 3 shots for the HPV vaccine. I think the only reason my dad made me get it is because he has no idea what I do and what it is really is; but I've realized that the shot makes my shoulder muscles tighten up (like botox) so my left shoulder won't crack and feel better as easily. It really sucks but another thing happened, not Monday today; my dads loan didn't go through (meaning he didn't get the loan) so that means I'm moving back in with my mom and my dad's going to move into my uncles basement. I'm actually really excited to be moving back, but I think my dad wishes I wasn't so open and enthusiastic. He wants me to miss him, I will but I've been missing my mom a lot more. His new commute is going to be 1 hr to maybe 3 hours because my uncles house isn't in a great place road location-wise. So that's really going to suck for him; but what I'M most worried about is my friends and school. I mean, what classes am I going to take going back to TJ High School? Gah! And my friends??? What about them? I mean I really screwed up my friendship with one of my girlfriends and then I got into a huge bitch fight with another but we worked it: it was mainly my fault because I was upset and overwhelmed by all what was going on so I created issues. But whatever, I just hope I have friends to go back to soon. And I'm moving on the 17th of this month, so I have a lot today; which includes the following: wash ALL my clothes and bed things, bag up ALL my clothes and bed things, and box up all my personal crap. Then on the 16th (a Friday) my mom's going to pick me and as much stuff as she can and take us back home. Yeah I said BACK HOME because that will always be 'home' to me. It's where I spent a good 7 years of my life, maybe even more because I might stay there. I don't want my dad to get depressed though, but my mom would say something like: you shouldn't worry about your dad, he can take care of himself. But in reality, I don't think he does a good job of it. I mean he's like 240 lbs at 6ft tall, that's kind of fat; don't get me wrong I love him, but being fat to me is gross. I understand that like maybe 5% of fat people have a genetic thing but most other people are just fat. Women sometimes just have wide hips or large bones, but men.....ugh. Men have no excuse, they're supposed to be larger bone-wise. I just....I would kill myself if I ever got fat; which is why I'm watching my weight right now. No I'm not dieting, I'm just thinking about my weight and trying not to eat too many chips.
Oh well night.