Day 14

Today is officially Thursday even thought I'm talking about Wednesday. Okay, well I was supposed to get my braces off (or at least that's what I thought) but it turns out I have 3 more months of treatment. When they told me that, I started crying right there; now usually I'm a great patient, I don't make any complaints about what they're doing in my mouth but that just broke me. I am so tired of wearing these shit contraptions. I first started wearing metal in my mouth in 4th grade: I had a small metal wire in the roof of my mouth, then I had a palette expander (that hurt like a mofo), then they took that out and put in a 'herps appliance' to fix my over bite; then soon after I had my front teeth in braces, later they took of my herps appliance to find out I needed 4 teeth removed. I didn't complain, I only wanted to know if there was any other options; apparently no, so I had my teeth removed and took that like a trooper. Finally, they put in all my braces. The worst of it was that they put my braces on my BIRTHDAY, I moaned about that but didn't through a tantrum. So I think I'm allowed some solace of getting my braces off. It's funny because my mom got braces and one time I was in getting worked on at the same time and she was moaning and making a lot of noise; it was kind of embarrassing because I take it silently. I hope to god I get these damn things off soon. I realized that I have aggressive thoughts but the logic and common sense part of my brain makes me not act on them; after they adjusted my braces part of me wanted to blow up the orthodontics office or kick someones face in. I didn't though because then the wouldn't be able to take off my braces. I always wanted to kill myself but didn't want  to die wearing braces; also funerals are very expensive and no one can afford another funeral after both my fathers parents died. Sometimes logic comes out the strongest.